You know, there are days when a piece of dark chocolate is all you need to recharge. Then there are days when you may need a scoop of really yummy chocolate chip cookie dough. And then there are days when you must have nothing short of a ton of chocolate and icecream. Each.
Today, I felt like nothing could help.
Haven't sunk this deep for a while. Last I recall was about 2004 or 2005? And yes, it's always related to work. Nothing too specific; just..work! *you have to imagine me spitting the word out like a poison*
This time, I diagnose myself with professional depression. Nothing clinical about this one.
For some time now, I have this card stuck to my CPU in the office. It reads "I don't hate my life". I think "don't" is underlined.
I have been playing a lot of puzzle games on my Pinky II to keep myself from dwelling on negative thoughts about work, about my working life. But it hit me that I was escaping. I should not escape! I must do something about it.
So, because of this negative energy in me, I don't feel too cute these days. In fact, I was rather afraid that something fundamental had changed in me. I mean, I always encourage people to be positive right?
I must remember that I sometimes need to encourage myself too :)
Must find time to go play sackboy... Be happy, mf!
I hit a wall today too, in the form of a @$#!#@$ colleague. He pissed me off so much, I was rambling on and on to poor Weili, and within about 5 minutes worth of conversation I used f*** and its derivatives about 100 times. He was like... you must stop harnessing the negative energy. But... who does that?! Haha... Anyhow. You need to see the bigger picture. My prescription? Get preggers. ^.^V Na
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