Bedtime with the boys

I used to check on my sleeping boys before my own bedtime, just to see their sleeping faces and sometimes cover their blankets properly. Often, I sneaked in a kiss or two, and for Yu, smelled his sweet saliva baby scent.

But I stopped that some time during the June term break. Yu said I didn't close his room door properly when I left and would rather I not go in *.* His room door is difficult to close fully - think the hinge was a bit off but we didn't realise earlier coz it wasn't used for sleeping until just before this year.

They're still alive :p

I'm glad that we still do bedtime with the younger ones. Nowadays, Sito meditates with Yang while I lie down with Yu. Then I turn out the light for Yu and lie down with Yang. If Sito is not around, Yang will do quiet things in his room or hang out with Kai until I'm ready for him. Kai has not wanted me to lie down with him since P5 or P6 - I can't remember exactly when but it was after we moved here in August 2023. He prefers to play chess on the iPad...

Bedtime routine with the boys is like stolen quiet time. Stolen from their little band of rowdiness and complete unawareness of others when they are playing and chatting among themselves. During this bedtime routine, there's only one parent and one child. During this time, little gems of life may emerge from the comfort of the bed and the hugs and snuggles.

With Yu, he likes to hug his fluffy toys as I hug him, and sometimes even talk to me through them. Bedtime chats are usually very light. Like this snippet. More recently, on 26 May, Yu prayed for the toy bear that he lost in Osaka. He said that was the first time he prayed. Mostly, he acts like a baby (or cat?) and 蹭 my arms and face like mad *.* Just like I may remind him to do things, he may also take the chance to remind me to do things for him!

With Yang, there were many memorable moments. When he was in child care, he prayed for a sniffling mama to get well. Once, I found him crying silently coz that day, I decided that I would only speak Mandarin at bedtime and he was afraid he wouldn't be able to understand me!?!

Last night, I was hugging Yang with his back facing me. He really wanted to get better marks so that he could have more phone time during term breaks. I told him how Papa and Mama had seen his good attitude - he may complain that he has no time to play but he would still come to us when we ask him to start work. And how hard he works! 

Yes, we all - parents and Yang himself - may be sad if he doesn't get good marks this year but it's ok if he has put in his best. And if he continues to put in effort, results would come in some form sooner or later. 

Next thing I knew, he rubbed his eyes. I asked if he was crying. He said a little. Awww.... My heart...

I really miss doing this with Kai. Sometimes, I go to his room after I'm done with Yang. Go away, he says, eyes still on the iPad :( He still comes to our room after playing chess. But it's just different from me going to his bed, somehow... Maybe all he talks about is chess which I don't get. I made a note to chat with him today. Hope I get to do it later...