Thursday 7 January 2010

Becoming a parent

Not yet la :p

At LH's farewell dinner, they were telling me to move to a room along the "fertile aisle" of the office where every occupant (who wanted to) got pregnant! True enough, in the past couple of years, we had four babies and a fifth is on his way!

And more recently, we were saying how people might shun getting married and having children in the coming lunar year - Tiger Year! 生一只母老虎怎么办呢? :p

Anyway, digressing...

So, I was thinking about this question the other day - when is a person ready to be a parent?

I think, mentally, there is no ready time. I mean, who would know without experiencing what parenting is like? I think when people say that they're not ready, it's more like they're not ready to spend time with child. Or is sacrificing that part of being ready?

I remember LH once said that you just had to plunge into it; if you had waited to be ready, you would never do it!

Guess in the end, it boils down to whether you want kids - that's the fundamental question.

Nowadays, people think a lot before having children. Including university expenses. Ok, so all parents think their kids will go to university but isn't that a bit far?

But wait, last time, people thought even further - must have children to 传宗接代 and even 送终! That means boys and the more the merrier! Example: Mother had me then MZ, then a miscarriage before finally getting YQ. Three children and a monthly household income of about $1,000 but she received only $300 a month to manage the household and feed FIVE persons for about 20 years. Inflation? Never heard of it!

Be it last time or now, I think there should be some pre-requisites before having children:
1) Marriage is stable. Read about people who think that having children can help stabilise a marriage.. 不要害人害己!
2) Job is kind of stable but it doesn't have to pay $5,000 a month before considering children!
3) You've thought through how to adjust life to suit the addition of a member to the family - very important cos if both parents work, there must be alternative care arrangements; if one parent stay at home, have facials monthly instead of weekly? (I wish but no, I don't do facials weekly now)

I think we are almost there except (3) where we are facing some uncertainties. Well, that should sort itself out within the next few months. And, I'm proudly resistant to the consultants trying to sell me more sessions cos my remaining SIXTEEN sessions are running out :p

2 comments:

  1. Erm wow the end was... kinda 离题 hahaha... But I think you should try to be the first amongst us to have a kid, seriously. 頑張ってください!Na

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  2. Haha I was reading thru your pre-requisites and thinking too that you and Sito have cleared almost everything!

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