Sunday, 28 August 2005

Home Run

Just watched it, I like. Two poor siblings sharing a pair of shoes back in the 1950s/60s. I don't recall sharing anything so badly when we were kids. Still, there was discontent. There always will be.

I couldn't understand why I would have new clothes and new shoes only during Chinese New Year.
I couldn't understand why I had to use rotten textbooks in primary schools. Realised some questions in my maths textbook differed from those in the new edition when a carefully checked answer was marked with a cross.
I couldn't understand why everyone had Barbie dollS and I was presented with merely a grade E imitate.
I couldn't understand why my classmates could eat ice-cream during recess time.

Then I grew a little and realised that Mother received $100-$200 every CNY to get CNY stuff including clothes for herself and the three of us.
Then I learnt to read the booklist and know that textbooks were expensive.
Then I saw how expensive Barbie dolls were (so I just went to the shopping centre to look and play with stuffed toys with CY)
Then I realised Mother received $300 a month to run the household, bills and meals, from 1980 to 1999.

And now that I can pamper myself whenever I feel like it, I become aware of the discontent in me, the non-material one that is more difficult to satisfy. It's an unsettling feeling that surfaces mostly when I'm in the house, especially when everyone is around. Like now.

Ok, it's getting depressing! I shall go read Harry Potter, make myself happy..

Gaaar, forgot to add.. Like you know how we girls are always saying we want to be tai-tais etc. Can't see how that will solve all discontentment! I don't need to be a tai-tai; I just want to be a full-time mum to four kids :p Um, ok, Potter now..

2 comments:

  1. I like the movie.. As a matter of curiosity, why do you want to have so many kids in future? And why a housewife when you have a successful career?

    SZ

    ReplyDelete
  2. Sorry to hear about your childhood. I'm glad that you became who you are today =).

    ReplyDelete

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