Even my colleagues are harping on my status: SINGLE (and unattached)
Before you suspect this blog is turning into another Sumiko Tan column albeit younger, let me come clean first: it is! Hahaha!
Ok, may sanity prevail.. This has been a crazy week. I had a major meeting this Wed so there were a number of things to prepare - logistics, other people's papers, my papers, my presentation. But I had only half of Mon due to a lecture in the pm and a subsequent dinner with the speaker, Dr Joseph Chamie. Quite an engaging guy so dinner with him was interesting. Anyway the bosses were talking of course; I was only sitting in to listen. And the food was nice, the scenery perfect - Top of the M, revolving restaurant. Went back to watch Desperate Housewives before getting down to work - sent out the damn thing at 1am.
Only half of Tues belonged to me. Was busy in the morning with a courtesy call from Dr Chamie. Had to run off towards the end for an important meeting elsewhere. At that meeting, we finalised the papers for the Wed meeting, which meant the whole pm was spent preparing for the correct set of slides. Ended my day at 930pm without even starting on the minutes for the courtesy call! Rehearsed my slides until I fell asleep..
But I was calm during the presentation. Still went rather fast but I thought I articulated my words better than the last time eg opporTUnity :p Have a similar presentation at yet another meeting next Wed, higher level one - must be calm.. Shall pretend that I'm acting, especially since I'll have a podium for next week..
Colleague did the minutes for Wed meeting so I had Wed pm to write the minutes for the courtesy call. And I went for ballroom, yeah! Better practise hard for the medal test on Sunday.. Was Thurs crazy? I can only remember the end of the day when there was a mad rush to finish up stuff..
mf: Eh, I'll try to finish but otherwise I'll give you the paper first thing tomorrow..? I'm going out tonight leh! Argh!
Boss: Hmmm, ok, first thing tomorrow, but that's assuming you can't finish tonight..
I finished at 820pm - yes! Rushed off to - guess what - buy a bag! Isetan private sale, my pretty bag had a 30% discount. I saved $87! Very satisfied :)
Fri was a little more relaxed with short periods of rush for certain things. Just back from a meeting, which leads me back to original topic.. Was with two married colleagues in their early 30s. Suddenly, somehow, they turned to me and "got boyfriend?", "don't have or fussy?", "faster find someone!", "have three kids, do your NS", "how about XX?" And I suddenly realised that when I moved to another unit in July, all my colleagues - ALL - will be married folks, who, presumably, will turn to unmarried me and start asking questions every so often..
And you know, just today during lunch, Siok had a weird thought of matching me with this director in another division. I was like, I seriously don't think so.. Uh ah, NO. Period. *.*
Of course now I must mention my KLK kakis and our usual chats. Some time ago, had a chat with Kel and Moh over their dinner and my supper. Verdict: How depressing! Looks like singlehood rates in Singapore cannot be helped! And as I see it at this point, KLK has rather high singlehood rates - 76.9%! But someone seems to be having some progress - I'm so going to squeeze the details out of him! :p
Just wondering.. Are we too focused on the wrong things? Some people want their career in place of a family. Ok, add to the stats.. Then some people expect too much of potential partners. More stats again.. And there are others who like to watch TV very very very very much - what do I say but to the stats, to the stats?!
Let's analyse mf.. I value family over career but now without a family (current one isn't too homely, hasn't been for 20years), my work is the only thing that keeps me occupied and fulfilled. Do I expect too much? Actually I don't think so but then, no one ever thinks so..
Learnt about this website from Omni, went there and took a free personality test to determine the kind of man that would suit me - think I've defined the perfect man ie non-existent *.* Crap!
Or maybe, it's so accurate that it's simply not possible? Since this is so long already, I might as well make it longer! An extract of the very long test results, also very much an analysis of myself if you change all the he to mf:
You don't need the perfect man, but you will do best with someone who tries to be sensitive to your feelings, even if he isn't always perfectly attuned to your needs. You will be mutually supportive, but won't demand more from each other than you are willing to give.
He is probably a bit of a loner.. probably focused on his own life, and doesn't let other people's misfortunes get him down.. someone who has bigger things on his mind than helping the homeless or donating to charity. He will appreciate that you are your own person and don't expect him to solve your problems. Your relationship will be based more on mutual respect than a need for emotional support. (mf: respect is very important!)
When in a relationship, he sees himself as part of a couple, but still maintains his independence and identity.
He's self-reliant and isn't looking for emotional support.. someone who isn't looking to be rescued; he can take care of himself.
He enjoys things like literature and fine art, but generally has other priorities when it comes to entertainment. Other people see him as someone who would visit some of the world's top museums during a trip abroad but who might neglect the ones in his own home town.
He takes pride in his looks but isn't defined by them.
He is accomplished academically, but doesn't overemphasize it. During his school years, he balanced studying with things like extracurricular activities, working or spending time with friends. He wants to have an intellectual connection with his partner, but he's also able to appreciate other things about her, like kindness, character or sense of humour.
He is generally happy and hopeful about what life has to offer. There may be parts of his life he'd like to improve, but he generally has faith that he'll attain his goals.. someone who tries to focus on the positive in good times and bad.
He is looking for a woman who shares similar ideas about parenting. He likes kids and probably has clear ideas about raising them. He feels that a couple will be much better parents if they are like-minded in their approach to things like discipline and communication with children. They will also experience more harmony and unity as parents - something he values.
He has a strong moral compass, but does not necessarily believe that everything done in the name of church or country in our society is correct. He is an independent thinker. Traditional gender roles and censorship generally strike him as wrong, but so may many of the more extreme liberal attitudes exhibited in pop culture. He doesn't have wildly radical views about society or morality.
He isn't the kind of person who gets involved with a faith community.. generally only attends religious services for weddings and funerals, and even then he's uncomfortable with organised religion.
He will understand if your relationship with your family is distant, uninvolved or filled with conflict. He may not have a perfect family either, and definitely doesn't expect family life to always be wonderful.
If anyone actually reads all that, I believe he/she may have reached the same verdict as mine - such a person doesn't exist!
I've been thinking and talking about my room lately and how I want it done. Mother heard me a couple of times and said (loudly, actually more like scolding) there was no reason for me to spend on the room if I was to get married and move out in no time! I was so frustrated with that - she just couldn't understand that (a) her scenario was so not going to happen, and (b) even if it's just for a short while, it will be heavenly to finally have some privacy and comfort! I am going to stay in that little room until at least 30, cos I don't foresee myself getting hitched by then AND I'm considering going overseas at 30 to work for fun ie not the earn big bucks kind, just for the experience. And if I do that, I'll come back only when it's time for me to get that flat, with or (I hope for her) without Na. We shall see..